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Why Can’t My Family Be Just Like Theirs?

Why can't my family be just like theirs?Why can’t my family be just like theirs?  This is a common question that families ask themselves from time to time.  When each day is based on problems after problems and meltdowns after meltdowns, you do look around you and think why can’t my family be just like theirs?

Social media is also adding more self judgement then ever before.  All you see around you is “perfect” families.  This also leads parent’s to the question “why can’t my family be more like theirs?”

Nevertheless, we just see a snap shot of a families 5 seconds that it took to take that photo.  We do not see what happened 5 seconds later or an hour later.  A perfect photo does not show us a families struggles as who will put that up for other’s to see.  If people continually put up amazing posts and photos of what they want people to see, people forget they have struggles.  I saw the perfect photo to illustrate this.

14708200_1213473358720355_2848913311369338979_nWhy can’t my family be just like theirs?

We only see what people want us to see.  As a parent, we may only be “seeing” what we want to see and that may be that everyone’s life is better than ours.  Everyone else can handle things better than me.

If you wanted to make changes in your family what would they be?

I would encourage you to write down any positive changes (which need to be realistic) you would like to make for your family and email me on so we can organise a free 30 minute phone call so that you can start making those changes.


When You Are Feeling Depressed

Are You Ok?When you are feeling depressed it is imperative that you speak up and seek help.  In the media, there has been reports of a murder/suicide of a family who have two children with severe autism.  I am not going to go into this story because at the end of the day the children were murdered.  Just because they have Autism does not make the action any different than a father throwing a child off a bridge.

Nevertheless, what is being highlighted there are so many families feeling isolated due to location, not having support, affordability of actually seeking professional services, feeling confident in seeking support or not being heard by professional services.

I know how hard these thoughts can be and I understand that there feels like there are no other choices.  How do I know this?  I have been to hell and back and I have had treatment I would not want anyone else to go through.  I spent approximately 7 months in between a mother/baby unit and a psychiatric ward after Emma was born.  I used to self harm and I put a suicide plan into action.

When you are feeling depressed to the point where you can not see any other option it is extremely hard to fight.  It is extremely hard to explain but it is a lot worse than the flicker of the thought “I could end my life right now”.  I want you to know that the light will come back. It will not be easy but you are going to have to fight through it.  I have come out the other side stronger for facing my demons and you can too.

More support needs to be offered for families.  At no point is your autistic child and what they are going through to blame.  You need to reach out and say “I need help” and keep fighting until you get the right help.

My email is always open for mums and dads who are needing emotional support.  No matter where you live, the thoughts you are having are you alone.  I do not judge anyone for the thoughts you might be having because I have had them too.  But I want you to email me and let me know you are in trouble.  We can work together to get through this tough hurdle.  You are not alone and I am here for you 24/7.

If you are needing some emotional help email me at  You are not alone no matter where in the world you are.