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Bullying Affects the Entire Family

When I shut my front door after dropping the girls off at school, I broke down in tears.  We are simply exhausted with the daily struggles of getting Grace to school.  I knew that bullying affects the entire family but I never really grasped just how much.  It is the endless conversations with teachers, Principals, with each other and by constantly being strong for your child.

I have been finding recently that I have been questioning every decision that I am making and wondering if they are the right ones.  Bully affects the entire family especially siblings.  They are also upset for their sibling and may also feel lonely as a lot of mum and dad’s attention is on their sibling.

Bullying affects the entire family so it is imperative that everyone looks after themselves as much as possible.

Strategies that can help your family with the effects of bullying are:

  1. Making sure that you are honest with each other with how you are feeling.
  2. Listen to your partner in how that they are feeling.
  3. Have someone that you can talk to about how you are coping.
  4. Make sure that you are eating healthy.
  5. Exercise can be extremely helpful to get the positive emotions flowing.
  6. Know that you are not alone.
  7. Never give up as your child needs you to look after yourself.
  8. Make sure that you spend time with each child.
  9. See how your other children are going.
  10. Come up with strategies on how you can support each other.
  11. One day a week, do something as a family.

If you are looking for any help please do not hesitate to contact me through Rebecca@coachingforlifetimechange.com.au even if you just want to let it out as you are not alone and happy to be here for you if you need an ear.

 

Beating the Effects of Bullying

Beating the effects of bullyingFor those who already have read recent posts, you would know that Grace has gone through four years of bullying.  We are always focused on ways of beating the effects of bullying for Grace.

Tonight she came to me crying about not wanting to go to school because she always is wondering what she will face tomorrow.  She has always had this type of thinking since Grade 1 and it can be challenging to keep her beating the effects of bullying on a daily basis.

For those who know Grace is 9.  I have tried this visualisation piece in the past but it has never helped.  However, I thought that I might give it another go as she is older and her imagination is always developing.

We had our forehead touching and I asked her to close her eyes.

I asked her to imagine that she has a balloon in her hand.

I asked her what colour it was and she said light pink, however she did change it later to a Katy Perry balloon.

I told her to blow the balloon up until it surrounded her (she groaned at thinking she had to blow the balloon up that big).

I said to her no matter what bad thing comes to you through mean words, pins to pop your balloon, they will never pop your balloon.  The only thing that can get through your Katy Perry balloon are kindness, love and happy thoughts and things (she made sure her teddy bear was able to get through).  No matter what bad things may come they just bounce off your balloon and it will never pop. 

At first she then was more interested in brushing her teeth as I broke the routine.  But by the time she reached her bed, she was thinking more about it as she asked is her balloon still around her when she was asleep.

A great vision piece for children when they are beating the effects of bullying.

 

Autism and Bullying

Autism and bullying

Individuals with Autism are affected by bullying!

A common myth in society is that individuals with Autism do not want to have friends.  If society believes that individuals with Autism do not want friends, then they would also not be affected by bullying.

Individuals with Autism are affected by bullying!

Another myth that society has is that individuals with Autism do not have emotions.  If people with Autism do not have emotions, then they can not possibly be affected by bullying because they are oblivious to it.

Individuals with Autism are affected by bullying!

I have been watching what four years of bullying has done to my daughter and if either of the above myths were true, my daughter would not be affected.  I totally understand the situation which the other girl is causing her to act out.  Her life is extremely hard and she feels that she needs to control all those around her.

Nevertheless this is not fair for my daughter to go through.  I have dealt with challenging children throughout my career, but sadly this girl puts challenging at such a different level.  But my daughter has been forgotten throughout it all.

My daughter has Autism.  She wants to have friends.  She knows what personal qualities she wants to develop.  But for her to come home one day and ask “why can’t I be nice to everyone?”.  This really broke my heart.  She does not want to go to school anymore.  She is scared of going out to play.  Her anxiety is through the roof.  She is now questioning if she will ever have “nice” friends as she now thinks she will only have mean friends.

My daughter is a very loyal friend.  Although she is terrified of the repercussions of walking away from her friend but she has always stood by her friend.

Bullying is simply not acceptable.

My local community constantly watches individuals harassing a neighbour who also is on the Spectrum.  Adults who all have licenses come out of their way and through objects constantly at his house to simply upset him and make him swear and yell for hours after.

Bullying is unacceptable and if you are doing it to someone for any reason, you need to look hard at yourself as it is unacceptable and it says a lot about you.

Individuals with Autism are affected by bullying!

 

Children’s Names That Will Only Lead To Bullying

What kind of name is North West?

Kim complains that the media tend to pick on her about everything and anything and then they name their child North West.  Someone honestly needs to smack her over the head and scream at her that naming their child something so ridiculous is only going to aim more bullying towards their child.  Imagine the jokes that children are going to put the poor thing through. It is bad enough that they have sold their child to the highest magazine bidder.

Parent’s really need to think about the consequence of choosing strange names and the affect it will have on the child.  We all do not want to our children to be bullied but why set them up from day one with a name like North, Apple and the list goes on.

What are the strangest names that you have heard parents call their child?

 

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