Paste your Google Webmaster Tools verification code here

Why Do I Want To Reawaken Myself?

26447en_USI_QuestionMark

Why Do I Want To Reawaken

Myself ?

 

 

 

 

What will it mean to me?

Why?

I really want you to continue to keep asking yourself why to those answers because I really want you to peel off the layers of why you truly want to reawaken you.

Are you will to put in whatever it takes to reawaken you?

If you decided not to reawaken yourself………………what really is the worst thing could possibly happen?  For me if I did not choose to reawaken myself and let my depression take over I know deep down I would be in a worse state of depression than I started at.  I would feel resentful to my family because I would be living a life where it was based on only being a mum (believe me, I love being a mum especially after beating depression, postnatal depression), driving the girls around for their therapy and also feel resentment towards my husband as he is doing sports that he loves.

What would it be for you and be true in your answer?

If you truly want to reawaken YOU, I really encourage you to sign up for my 12 week course.  The best aspect of what I do is watching my clients grow.  For those who may be a bit hesitant I am developing a self guided workbook and an online program.  If you are interested about these options there is a link at the bottom of the above link and let me know that you are interested in either the self guided book on itself or the online program.

It’s Hard Watching My Child With Anxiety!

Grace lines

To watch my child with anxiety is heart breaking.  As a person who suffers from high anxiety it is hard enough for me to deal with on a bad day.  The feeling that I have to flee from somewhere.  The tightness in my chest and upper body.  The feeling like I need to go to the toilet desperately.  The feeling that self harming is a way to escape the pain and turmoil within me.

The look of panic when I ask her something.  The need for her to line up her toys in lines. The above line has been moved and now three rows deep.  We got to the stage where there would be so many lines there was no floor space and watch out if you moved anything by a millimetre.  The clinging onto me when we enter the school gates.  Plus we can not forget the emotional volcano that erupts when we get home.  But that is only one part of the autism spectrum.

Strategies to help your child with anxiety:

  • We give Grace a chew necklace to give her something to chew on.  It is also a great visual tool for the teachers to know where her anxiety is at with the rate she is chewing it.
  • Listen to your child.  We do not need to have all the answers as sometimes it helps with listening and a cuddle.
  • Normalize what your child is feeling.  I find Grace understands more when I explain how I feel when I am feeling anxious.
  • Model ways to relax and let the child discover what works for them.  Grace tends to ask for breaks where she tunes out to her environment.  Sometimes she likes to do jump and crash type activities.  Grace also uses re
  • Avoid giving your child excessive reassurance but encourage your child your child to use their coping strategies.

If you would like help with creating a wonderful relationship with your child and you helping your child with anxiety is a goal for you please have a look at the two links below so that I can help you.

http://coachingforlifetimechange.com.au/surviving-to-thriving-for-mums-with-special-needs-children/

http://coachingforlifetimechange.com.au/services/

 

It’s Not Your Fault

I was just watching Good Will Hunting on TV and it came up to the part where the therapist says “It’s not your fault” “It’s not your fault” over and over until Will cracks.  This part of the movie has always resonated with me and I wanted to share it with you.

I want to tell you that your PND/PPD/Depression/Anxiety is not your fault.  If you have children with special needs “it’s not your fault”.  If you have had a hard time transitioning to parenthood “It’s not your fault”.

Because “it’s not your fault”.

No one ever chooses having mental health issues and no one chooses to have children with special needs.  Sadly it just happens and you need to keep telling yourself that it is not your fault.

You, as a mum or dad, do not need to add any more guilt about your situation and if you want help to rescue your family relationship, I am here to help you do that 100% of the time.

How to Help a Child with Autism During the Christmas Period

Amaze (Autism Victoria) in their monthly magazine The Spectrum Volume 9, Number 4, Summer Edition 2013-14, they have written a wonder article about how to reduce the anxiety and stress for ASD children.

Strategies that they have suggested are:

  • Talk about the holiday period and what that means for your child and family.
  • Minimise change as children are finishing schools for the year and will be heading into longer holidays.
  • Continue to continue to use positive behavioural strategies.
  • Make a visual calendar/timetable for them to follow.
  • Talk about any changes.
  • Keep routine as much as possible
  • Create photos albums of people who they will see at functions.

These could be some really important for children with autism.

Someone Who Understands

Wouldn’t it be great to get help from someone who understands?  Someone who understands how hard it is to be a new mum, someone who understands about having postnatal depression and understand how challenging it is to have children with special needs.

If you said a resounding YES to this answer well your in luck here.  I know how hard it is in these three areas as because these are my areas that I have personally live through on a daily basis.  My girls definitely did not give us an easy time as babies, I have lived through postnatal depression and depression and am now enjoying life and I have two children with autism and severe sensory processing disorder.

It can be extremely frustrating to seek help by someone who truly does not understand what you are going through.  But I do and I want to help you.  My family have definitely gone through to the depths of “crap” but we have managed to get through it all.  We are not perfect but we can get through anything as a family.

I am here to help you and your family start a new family beginning and start thriving as a family.  There is nothing you could say to me that would shock me and I just want to help you.

So Proud of My Girl

Grace calisthenics awards I am so proud of my big girls Grace.  She simply amazes me on how far she has come.  After she was diagnosed with autism, we did wonder what the future will hold for her.  But my goodness with all the wonderful help we have received from therapists, her kindergarten teachers at Keilor Park Preschool and at Keilor Heights Primary school it has proven how essential it is to get all the help you can.

She started calisthenics at Kendara Calisthenics this year and to watch her grow has been amazing.  She is enthusiastic each week and really tries her best.  We had her final concert a week ago and she won the tinnies group annual award for all her hard work.

 

Steve and I realise that Grace will always try her best and she will always have such supportive people around her.  Even Emma was simply so excited for her big sister which is simply beautiful and I do hope that they will always be excited about each others achievements.

Unblock the Situations That is Stopping You From Creating A Thriving Family Relationship.

This video is to help you to unblock any situation that is blocking you from taking the steps to create a thriving family relationship. If you want to know more about how I can help you, look under the service page and provide me with your contact details so I can give you a call to see how you and your family can create thriving relationships no matter what your situation is. I learnt this process from Christian Mickelson.

Emotional Eruptions (Meltdowns)

I have to admit that I am not a massive fan of calling my children’s emotional eruptions as meltdowns because I guess people already a perceived perception of what entails.  But reality, is what happens is that their emotions goes to extreme levels and I always picture a volcano erupting with their emotions flowing over.

I have to admit that I do not enjoy them what so ever.  Grace has a massive set of lungs Ahh! and the last eruption went on for 1.5 hours and she was impossible to bring down.  Then if Emma joins in it definitely becomes a noisy house.  Sometimes I worry what the neighbours think is going on in my house.  Sad.

But I find that my stress levels increase as I feel like I have an inability to cope with them.  Then by the time Steve comes home I am stressed, cranky and wanting to escape.  It also puts Steve and I at odds and it is not that we disagree on how we handle the situations but Steve feels bad that he is working and I am simply just cranky mainly with myself.  I find it easier to simply talk to Steve about how I am feeling and Steve simply just listens,

The way we help the girls is that we sit with them.  Both tend to scream go away and lash out but I know that they want us close.  Children at all ages (especially when they are tantruming) need help in managing their emotions.  Most children do not understand their own emotions and get quite confused.  If a child can not put a label on the emotion and not understand them, they will not be able to control their emotions.  We see countless times the affect of adults loosing their own control of emotions but we do not allow children who do not understand those emotions.  We explain when they are quieter what they are feeling and they are slowly learning strategies to help them overcome these moments.

Relationships at Breaking Point for Families With Children with Special Needs

Special Needs Logo.2   In Monday 11th Melbourne Herald-Sun, there is a sad article about families who are at breaking apart point with children with special needs.  Children with special needs do get lots of assistance with early intervention before the age of 7.  However between the ages of 7-18 there is little support out there for this age group.  The situation is becoming just so bad that parents are being forced to the point where they have little choice but to give the child up into State care.

Reading this article bought tears to my eyes, to think the situation is coming to that.  Yes, the economy is tough at this moment and it is hard to fund all areas in desperate need.  Nevertheless, there is so much wasting of money especially within Government agencies, that this “wasted” money could be used to assist families who have children with special needs.  Maybe the politicians should really think before their next pay rise, could this money be spent in better areas to help families with special needs to remain a family unit?

We are blessed that we have two girls with high functioning autism, who therapy does cost a lot of money, but it is no where near as much as a family with a child who has a severe special need.

Here at Coaching for Lifetime Change we can assist you in creating a thriving family relationship and help mums not get to the stage where they have to choose to give their child up for State care.  Nevertheless, there needs to be more being done to improve resources within the community to also ease the burden these poor families are faced with.  If you want to know more about our services please click on the link http://coachingforlifetimechange.com.au/surviving-to-thriving-for-mums-with-special-needs-children/

To Repeat or Not To Repeat KIndergarten?

In Victoria kindergarten is the year before children head into the school system so they usually attend between the age of 4 to 5 years of age.  This year Emma is at kindergarten and the transition to kindergarten was pretty much smooth sailing since she spent a lot of time there with my role of being the President and Grace was there.  Late last year Emma was diagnosed with severe sensory disorder with severe defensiveness and she was also diagnosed with autism.  Emma main areas of weakness is social and emotional and all of her sensory areas are in fight or flight mode and they are difficult to bring down.

Emma has done a fantastic job with kindergarten and it has been fantastic to see that she made a couple of really close friends and we did not have a lot of tears.  So I guess when reading this heading why we have been questioning if Emma should repeat another year instead of heading off to school as one of her little friends is going to the same school.  Over the years, she has always been about 8 months behind her peers and when you put that in context of school transition 8 months really is a long time before she does another developmental jump.  But what we see outside of the kindergarten gates is why we have really gone through the massive highs and lows of deciding if we should push for Emma to do another year.

What makes things even harder is that the Government is making it extremely impossible for children to do another year solely because it can cost the Government more money for children doing a second year. I can understand they want to stop the parents who are struggling to accept that their child is growing up and wanting to keep them home for an extra time for their own needs rather than the child’s needs.  But for a child like Emma, she needs an extra year to emotionally develop.  When we go to school to pick up Grace (it is also a small school as well), Emma runs to me to be picked up.  She will not play in the play ground if other children are there no matter if the child is near her or not.  She also has only in the last month (its October now) to make eye contact with Grace’s teacher and still has not said a word at all.  She also is just breaking her aversion to males (had this since birth and she is Daddy’s little girl) and there are lots of male teachers.  The school has also said that Emma is not ready for the transition to school yet and they have seen through Grace the benefits that Emma will have with another year at kindergarten.

We are lucky that we have a very supportive kindergarten but it is sad that children will be sent off to school ready or not because the Government is requiring mountains of paper work and I can not ssee teachers completing all the forms.

For Steve and I, the decision has also been a hard one and we have become quite emotional (ok that is probably more me than Steve) as we have wrestled with the decision but more the fact that her best friend is heading off to school.  Emma has caught on now that her friend will not be there next year and Emma is showing a lot of anxiety with an escalation of behaviour.    I know over the last couple of weeks, I have gone through a grief cycle as they are transitioning to school and Emma is not.

But I know that we are doing the best thing for Emma no matter what the Government says.  Maybe they should come and visit the kindergarten so I can educate them on the needs of some children.  These children will only get lost within the school system or they will be bullied if they have to repeat at school.

 

 

//