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Are You Feeling Deprived?

Are you feeling deprived?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are you feeling deprived?

When I have session with a client I ask them “Are you feeling deprived”?  It makes everyone think and they usually say yes.

Typical answers that clients share are:

  • Sleep
  • Emotional support
  • Time to myself
  • Physical energy
  • Not catching up with friends
  • Companionship
  • Peace
  • Hope
  • Touch
  • Peace and quiet
  • Not having a relaxing day without a meltdown
  • Someone who understands.

Awareness id a powerful catalyst for positive change and in time when you start to recognise when you are feeling deprived, you can put self care into practice.

I have come to learn that over giving is often a sign of deprivation – a signal that a need isn’t being met, an emotion isn’t being expressed, or a void isn’t getting filled.  For example, while you might dedicate hours to coordinating the family’s social calendar, you may actually be yearning for deeper and more meaningful connections, stimulating conversation, or greater intimacy with yourself.  You might also be available and generous with others because on some level you have an unconscious desire to get what you give, whether it’s acknowledgement, affection, recognition, or support.

Becoming away of how you feel deprived can be a key to recognising what needs to shift emotionally and physically.  In what ways are you starving yourself of what you need to live a rich and fulfilling life?

Since awareness in and of itself inspires change, I’d like to challenge you to spend the next 30 days becoming skilled at seeing the ways, big and small, that you deprive yourself of what you need.  Rather than feeling like a victim to something outside of yourself, when you realise that you alone are responsible for over giving, you can actually empower yourself to do something about it.

Discovering where you feel deprived

This challenge is a call to consciousness – becoming more aware of how, why and where you feel deprived.  It is handy to have a little notebook handy that you can take everywhere with you.  Whenever you feel overwhelmed, frustrated, burdened, or resentful, stop and ask yourself:

  • Where do I feel deprived?
  • What do I need more of right now?
  • What do I need less of?
  • What do I want right now?
  • What am I yearning for?
  • Who or what is causing me to feel resentful and why?
  • What am I starving for?

Your answers to these questions will help you to identify the areas of your life that are calling for greater consciousness, an increase in your awareness of what needs to change to keep you from feeling deprived.

If you would love to join my It’s Time to Look After Me, we look in depth in this are.

 

 

Are You Feeling Deprived in Your Life?

I am reading an amazing book by Cheryl Richardson about Self Care and she brings to the readers attention about what are you feeling deprived in?

I have recently been asking mums that very question and that does tend to leave them stumped.  The usual mother guilt rears its ugly head about not saying anything bad whilst other mums do not want to answer that question at all.  But how you are going to reawaken you if you can not share what you feel deprived in?  One thing I better share here is that it is ok to answer this question with whatever you feel deprived in and there is absolutely no judgement from my end and it is all confidential.

What happens when you are faced with a challenging situation?  It is completely normal, especially when life gives you an unexpected challenge that we revert back to old coping strategies that kept us safe when we were kids.  When I ask mums what their coping strategies are in the face of challenging moments, the answers range from isolating from others, not asking for help, not reaching out for emotional help and hiding emotions.  I know that I am not any different.  Cheryl Richardson, also states that over-giving is often a sign of deprivation.  A behaviour of over-giving can be a sign that a need isn’t being met, an emotion isn’t being expressed, or a void isn’t getting filled.

To become aware of what you are feeling deprived of is a powerful tool to moving towards change.  I want you to answer the following questions. Take as long as you need to really think about what you are feeling deprived of:

  • Where do you feel deprived?
  • What do I need more of right now?
  • What do I need less of?
  • What do I want right now?
  • What am I yearning for?
  • Who or what is making me feel resentful for?
  • What am I starving for?

By answering this question, you have started reawakening you and working out what needs are currently needing to be met. If you have answered these questions and you want some guidance, please email me at info@coachingforlifetimechange.com.au as I am here for everyone who has read this article and want some further help.

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