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The World is on Top of Me

Hands up if you feel like the world is on top of you?

Pass on a hug2The news is full of unhappy tales at the moment with unrest in countries, people getting murdered, parents murdering their own children, job losses etc.  Those are events we sadly do not have any control.  Then add any personal ones on top of that for instance cyber bullying, children being unwell or for us our dog is unwell.

It is extremely important that we all remember that we need to be there for each other.  We may not be able to solve the problem but we all have ears that so that we can listen.  Too many of us are so consumed with our own lives we forget or put aside that we need to check in with each other to see if we are ok.

However, during the times when we feel that the world is on our shoulders, we need to be aware of how we are treating those we love.  Just because you feel stressed does not give you any right to abuse, physically assault and hurt any other human being.  We tend to snap at those we love and it really is not on.

If you are feeling stressed and feeling like you are going to explode, please talk to someone before you do.  Call someone close or through a hotline to tell them that you are not ok.  We can not be strong all the time.  It is important during the times of stress to do have some me time so that you can breathe and feel grounded.  If you want to email me at as sometimes it is great just to get it out of the head.  I promise to answer your email as soon as I see it.

Always remember that you are not alone and there are people out there who simply want to listen.

The “Pros and Cons” About Becoming a Parent

I can hear people right now stomping their feet to my front door and coming with pitch forks screaming “You are lucky to be able to have children”, “You chose to have children” and all the rest of it.  I am hoping that some of you might actually read the rest of this article and may find this activity really beneficial.

Once you have little one in your arms, have you ever told your partner what you love about being a parent and what you do not look about becoming a parent?

Research shows that simply acknowledging the good and bad things about becoming a parent is actually a very healthy activity for parent’s to do.  By being able to talk about our thoughts in a constructive and safe environment, mums and dads can feel that they are being heard in regards to their thoughts of becoming a parent.

I remember thinking I was prepared for the change and that I will not be able to simply go out and catch up with friends and accepting the new journey I was about to embark on.  But honestly and I would love to hear from other mums and dads if they were truly prepared as much as you thought you were.  But be acknowledging the differences can be extremely therapeutic as you can let it out of your head and also let it go.

Is it a crime to do this?  Hell no.  If every parent did this activity, we might see a trend of people transitioning to parenthood a lot easier than what a lot of parent’s are at this stage.

I did not do this activity until I did volunteer training at PANDA and it really stuck with me that it is OK to say what we love and may be what we are still learning to adjust to. On my list were:

What I love:

  • That they were created out of love
  • Their little hands and toes
  • That we got through the birth process
  • Their little noises

What I Did Not Like:

  • PND (Postnatal depression)
  • My older child’s constant crying (boy does she have a set of lungs)
  • Breastfeeding (I had trouble with supply but was not confident who to call for help and Grace never attached)
  • Not being able to work
  • Not catching up with people as much as I used to.

Maybe my next post should be a follow up to the pros and cons and see how much things have changed.  I have attached below a sheet that mums and dads can use to do this activity at home.  Do not judge or analyse what people put on their list as it needs to be done in a safe environment so those thoughts can be acknowledged and then put aside.

Good and Bad stuff chart (Printable)